Maia's wonderful Mom, Jill joins us for this episode of TTMB. Maia shared a few of her own songs that remind her of her mother, and found out what songs remind her of her mom. This trip down memory lane felt very full circle for Maia. Maia loves her mom so much, and music is something they both love so this was an absolute joy for both Maia and Kelan.
Embedded Files
Full Transcript
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You know, when you hear a song
and it triggers a memory, it
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instantly takes you back to a
particular person or place or
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moment.
This podcast is all about that
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song and those memories.
Welcome to That Takes Me Back,
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where we share stories that
connect music and memories.
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We're your hosts.
Kellen, David.
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And Maya Sage and on today's
episode, wait, is this the
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concert you were telling me
about where you almost got
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concert crushed and you went to
the.
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Top of the note that was Beastie
Boys.
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Tell me about that real quick.
Well OK, so they were supposed
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to be at Red Rocks but weather
happened and so they changed the
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venue.
I remember leaving that show at
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all.
Wow, I have no memory.
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So that was a great night.
I remember standing there and I
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remember somehow I found my
friend good.
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I wanted to thank my mom for
coming on the podcast 'cause I
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know it was a little bit out of
her comfort zone, but it was
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incredibly special for me to
have her on the podcast.
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She impacted my love of music a
lot, and I wanted to say not
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only thank you to my mom, but I
wanted to say that I'm so proud
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of my mom and so grateful for
her.
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Because through this
conversation, I kind of realized
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that she doesn't have very many
fond memories with her own mom.
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And I just feel like she was so
strong while we were kids, being
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a single mom of three kids, she
somehow made it all work.
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I mean, the struggle was real,
but she did everything she
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needed to do.
She made a lot of sacrifices and
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she worked really hard to
always, always provide for all
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of our basic needs and the
things that we wanted to.
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But beyond that, somehow she
found a way to create all these
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warm, fuzzy memories for us.
Yeah, well, her love for you and
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your siblings is very apparent,
and the fact is that she is
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indeed the cool mom.
She really is.
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She really is the cool mom and
she always has been.
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And I have so many fond memories
that I get to return to, some of
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which I did during this podcast,
which was cool because a lot of
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those fuzzy memories are
surrounded by music.
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Memories of her singing along to
her favorite songs in the car.
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Memories of her putting on her
favorite music while she cleaned
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the house.
Memories of us going to concerts
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together and dancing our hearts
out like I have.
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I have so many fond memories
that I get to return to.
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Yeah, it was cool that she
didn't come with much of A plan
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as far as what she was going to
talk about.
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And you ended up introducing a
couple of songs that did bring
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her back successfully.
And it was really cool that you
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were sort of the one who
inspired that real time.
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Yeah.
Reminiscing.
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Yeah, I had a lot of fun
bringing my own memories of
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things that take me back to my
childhood with her and with
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music.
Such a gift to have had her on
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this podcast, to be able to
glimpse some of her memories
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around music that are tied to
her mom.
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I think now that she's been on
this podcast, it's kind of this
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full circle moment where the
next time that my family and I
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get together to play cards and
hang out, we're going to put
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music on in the background.
And inevitably a song is going
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to come on that's going to be
tied to her mom's taste in
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music.
And now I get to relish in those
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memories too, even though I
never got to meet her mom.
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But now that I know some of the
music that came from her, that
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came through my childhood too,
but I just didn't realize.
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Yeah, that's.
From my mom's mom.
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That's actually so cool that you
were able to hear those stories
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for the first time, a glimpse of
that music history within your
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family.
It was really.
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Special.
And now it feels like I have a
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bit of a living connection, like
a little bit of a bridge to this
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person that I never met through
reminiscing together with my mom
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so.
It was just.
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Really, really special.
And I want to say again, I'm
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going to get a little bit
emotional, but I just love my
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mom so much and I'm so proud of
everything that she did raising
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us.
And I'm so grateful that I get
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to enjoy her and have her be.
Like she's still a cool mom.
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She's still a cool.
Mom, she's one of my best
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friends and I love that.
That makes me really happy and
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it makes me feel like she did a
really good job improving upon
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the parenting that that she got
that was so much less than what
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she deserved.
Yeah, yeah.
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And I think that that takes so
much strength to break those
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cycles because it's so easy to
become your parents.
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And she decided not to and took
that decision seriously.
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And it produced you, who I know
pretty well now and we sure are
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glad about that.
Yes, I am too.
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Thank you.
Thanks again mom for coming on
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my podcast.
I hope you had fun and I hope
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everybody who listens has has a
good listen so.
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I'm so happy to welcome my
wonderful mom to the podcast.
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Thank you for being here.
Mom.
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Of course, also known as Jill.
Yeah, also known as.
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Also known as Jill.
Still wishing that your name was
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Jillian so it could be Jillian
and Adrian.
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I know that the two of you are
married, but it's OK, whatever.
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Maybe that'd be a bit much.
Do you remember when I used to
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have another name?
Candle, you do have a lot of
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aliases, Mom.
Just one.
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Oh, OK, only one.
Alias.
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Well, and Jillian is just your
couple's name then.
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Yeah, right.
That's just the.
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Extension of my name, yeah.
Yeah, it's like a nickname.
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So then yeah.
And and Kendall was just sort of
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a like a starting a new life
over when you move from the East
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Coast, right.
It was Yeah.
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So yeah.
It's interesting how, like Joey,
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sometimes my Aunt Joey will
still call you that because
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that's how she met you.
And then I'll be like Candle.
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Yeah.
You know, that's what your
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brother always called me too.
Oh yeah.
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'Cause he never called me.
Well, not never.
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He did call me mom until he was
about 2 1/2.
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Wow.
He's too smart for this Earth.
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And then he just, and then it
just started.
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And I think he's, I think it
started with your dad.
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I think he started calling him
Matthew.
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And of course your dad was like,
that's kind of funny, OK, we're
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just going to let that ride.
And then he started calling me
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Candle and I don't know.
I mean, just let it go.
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That's so interesting.
He's such an interesting kid.
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I know people are really
offended by that.
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Other people were super offended
that I let him.
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Call me.
By my name, like it's
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disrespectful or something.
And I never, I never understood
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that well.
Because it wasn't disrespectful,
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it was obviously just like he
was a genius child.
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And one day he had the epiphany.
Oh well, these people have names
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just like my name, so I'm going
to use their names.
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Why would I call him this weird
name when that's their name and
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that's so he interested?
Yeah.
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I don't believe in titles.
Honestly the fact that he even
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understood that you guys have
key names at like 2 1/2 is
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insane because I didn't know
that that young he was.
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I have.
No idea what happened.
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That was also when he discovered
gravity.
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Oh, you told me about that.
That was a moment.
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That was a real moment.
Let's hear it.
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He just like, I was folding
laundry and just came in the
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room and he was, I think they
were Hot Wheels.
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And he just kept throwing them
up in the air and he'd pick them
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up and he'd throw them up in the
air.
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And he's like.
Everything falls down.
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Wow.
He's just he's just go over and
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over again.
I like, I just knew.
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I was like, oh shit, dude, he is
working out physics right now.
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He's literally working.
This is a.
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Smart kid.
So fucking cool and that, I
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think that's why we gave him so
much latitude, right?
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You can call me whenever you
want, bro 'cause you're just too
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smart.
Yeah, something else is going
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on.
Yeah, why?
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Why try and cage that?
No.
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Yeah, and that's just not the
kind of parents neither of us
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were.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, wait, oh, oh,
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that see, I came with my own.
That takes me back.
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And I'm going to play that real
quick.
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This song is my very own That
takes me back.
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It's a that takes me back inside
of it.
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That takes me back because I
remember being a little kid,
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like probably elementary school,
so I was probably pretty young
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in the back seat of the car in
this song was playing, and I
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don't know why.
Maybe I was annoying you with
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questions.
I'm not sure.
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But.
You shared with me that this
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song always takes you back to
the summertime, to being young
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in the summertime.
And I can't remember exactly
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what you said about like why it
was summer.
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I don't know, I don't know.
How old you were?
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But it's just so funny that I
have my own that takes.
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Like, this song always takes me
back to the back seat of your
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car.
Learning about your own memory
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of this song, it's so silly.
But it is a good song.
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And that's why it's in my
nostalgia playlist.
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Nice.
Yeah.
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But yeah.
What about this song is summer
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for you?
I'm not sure, honestly, and I
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can't attach it to a specific
memory of summertime.
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I think just being young and
free, you know, before adulthood
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comes, you know what I mean?
Like.
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Totally there.
There was definitely a time
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where I felt like my
responsibility in the summer was
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to figure out how to have as
much fun as possible.
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Right.
And like, stay out of the way of
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your parents is kind of the only
thing on your list is or like
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grandparents or whatever.
Come back at dinnertime, yeah?
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Also, sunset.
I can't tell you why.
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I don't know.
Maybe that's when I first heard
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it.
I mean honestly, it gives sunset
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vibes.
I can totally see that.
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But yeah, maybe it was just one
of those summer sunset.
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Maybe, maybe the end of summer,
like, yeah, like we're closing
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it down.
So you're having like a like a
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nostalgic feeling at the end of
summer being like, yeah.
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Yeah, like this was a good.
This was a good fucking summer,
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Yeah.
Yeah, wow.
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God, the feeling of when life is
so simple that it's summer and
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not summer.
Yeah.
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You know.
Yeah.
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Totally.
I know it's funny because, yeah,
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looking back, I'm like, I love
summer so much.
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I love summer so much.
I love summer so much.
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No, I loved the freedom.
Yeah, like now it's summer and
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I'm like, it's too damn hot.
No, no.
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Yeah, it's not.
Yeah, no.
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Not ever too hot for me.
Not ever.
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I was so.
Happy, mom that you were our
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guest today.
Because when I walked into the
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building, I was like, it's
fucking hot in here.
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Something's wrong with this
thermostat.
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And then I was like, Oh well,
good thing my mom's not going to
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care.
Right, she's a.
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Human lizard.
So.
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So that was just a little window
into music that I got from you.
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And I kind of want to do one
more if that's OK.
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OK, Can I kick it off with
another one?
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Sure, because I kind of did.
You didn't have any ice breaker
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questions that you wanted to
ask, did you?
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00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,560
Well.
I did have one, but I don't, you
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know, you kind of pulled this on
me with my brother and, and dad,
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but you know, just like, what
was Maya like with her siblings
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growing up?
Oh God.
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I was expecting that.
Let's see here, Maya was very
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much a caretaker.
I can definitely see that, yeah.
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She did, which I think neither
of her siblings were crazy, but
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no.
OK.
226
00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:32,520
It's very much appreciated at
work, I'll say that.
227
00:12:32,560 --> 00:12:34,680
Yeah.
That's just always, that's been
228
00:12:34,680 --> 00:12:36,840
her thing always.
It's crazy.
229
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:38,360
I think that's not.
Embarrassing.
230
00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:40,080
No, that's.
Not actually that embarrassing,
231
00:12:40,080 --> 00:12:43,080
but it there were times when it
was like Aspen was like, you're
232
00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:44,480
not my mom.
Yeah.
233
00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:47,280
And I put some of that on you
too.
234
00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:51,080
There were plenty of times when
I would kind of like go, go get
235
00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:53,240
your sister or go take care of
your sister.
236
00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:54,600
I would.
Have been doing it anyway
237
00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:56,800
though.
Whatever, that's the thing when
238
00:12:56,800 --> 00:13:00,320
when Aspen was born, I don't
know how a four year old has
239
00:13:00,320 --> 00:13:03,240
this strong of convictions, but
I was obsessed with her
240
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:07,840
immediately and I knew that like
I was I just went into big
241
00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:09,280
sister mode.
Like you're right.
242
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:13,280
I just I just took it upon, I
don't know the caretaker and
243
00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:15,760
it's just immediately, I don't
know, it was just like a little
244
00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:18,120
baby.
I was like, well, babies.
245
00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:21,280
And then you have to be taken.
Care of right?
246
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:24,200
You got to the aggressively
helpful part.
247
00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:26,280
Yeah, and.
Then and then it just like, like
248
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:28,720
it would have happened no matter
what, where I would have ended
249
00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:31,400
up being the kind of person
like, like I could have just
250
00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:37,520
been a kid and enjoyed some of
those nights when like mom's at
251
00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:41,680
work and Matthias doesn't give a
shit about whether we're living
252
00:13:41,680 --> 00:13:44,120
or dead.
He's two years older than me,
253
00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:47,080
but like, not an older brother
energy at all.
254
00:13:47,080 --> 00:13:50,520
He was off doing his own thing,
listening to the same album five
255
00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:52,440
times or playing a video game or
whatever.
256
00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:56,680
And so I could have just been
doing whatever I wanted.
257
00:13:56,680 --> 00:14:00,200
But often times I still for some
reason wanted to be the one that
258
00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,480
was like, OK, guys, it's time to
take showers.
259
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,360
OK, we have to clean up from
dinner or whatever.
260
00:14:07,360 --> 00:14:10,560
Like, yeah.
Which is why I didn't leave you
261
00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:13,240
guys alone until you were old.
Actually.
262
00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:16,680
Like old enough to babysit.
Yeah, 'cause he was not one to
263
00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:18,400
be depended on for that.
Worthless.
264
00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:20,960
Yeah.
That's crazy.
265
00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:22,080
He just.
It's not.
266
00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:25,720
I don't mean that in a like a
really negative way, it's just
267
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:30,480
he was way too hyper focused on
whatever he was doing that the
268
00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:34,120
rest of the world could be on
fire and straight up he just
269
00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:37,480
wouldn't know like the rest of
us ADHD.
270
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:42,400
Yeah, you know, well, I'll.
Tell you to this day, my
271
00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:49,040
siblings and my cousins who have
young children do not ask me to
272
00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:53,560
babysit.
So.
273
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:56,320
So I'm going to take it as not a
bad thing.
274
00:14:56,320 --> 00:14:58,440
It's not a bad.
Thing it's just, you know, we
275
00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:02,920
all have particular skill sets
and, you know, not everybody has
276
00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:03,760
that one.
Yeah.
277
00:15:03,760 --> 00:15:06,800
And you know.
There's also something that just
278
00:15:06,800 --> 00:15:11,280
happens when you have to block
something out from your
279
00:15:11,280 --> 00:15:14,400
attention all the time because
it's an annoying nuisance to
280
00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:16,920
you.
Like I'm like, he was the older
281
00:15:16,920 --> 00:15:20,840
brother with these two annoying
fucking little sisters playing
282
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:22,960
and screaming and hey, what are
you playing?
283
00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:25,480
What are you listening to all
the time?
284
00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:28,840
So like, of course you're just
going to like, make your brain
285
00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:32,360
automatically shut out every
single piece of sensory input
286
00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:33,640
that comes from the.
Two of.
287
00:15:33,640 --> 00:15:35,800
Them because I would even do
that too.
288
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:39,920
Aspen, do you remember how mad
she used to get at me if I was
289
00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:43,560
ever accidentally like ignoring
her or not hearing her?
290
00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:47,640
She would get so livid with me
and I would be like genuinely
291
00:15:47,640 --> 00:15:50,520
dude, I didn't know you were
saying anything because I've
292
00:15:50,520 --> 00:15:53,120
gotten so used to ignoring you
that I so.
293
00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:56,000
So, so you're one way or the
other then you're either like
294
00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:59,480
cling on or just completely
ignoring, yes.
295
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:03,680
I think, I think honestly,
everybody learned it from me,
296
00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:08,680
'cause how many times, though,
was I like reading a book and
297
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:15,720
it'd be mom, mom, mom, mom,
yeah, and I just wouldn't
298
00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:17,600
notice.
Well.
299
00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:22,400
Also, like kids are constantly
fucking doing that and sometimes
300
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:24,520
you're trying to have a
conversation with somebody.
301
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:28,040
I know so many times you were
literally busy speaking to
302
00:16:28,040 --> 00:16:33,400
people and we would just be like
mom, mom, mom, like shut.
303
00:16:34,480 --> 00:16:36,320
It is funny sometimes that
happens at the library.
304
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:40,320
They'll be like a kid and be
like mom, mom, mom, mom, mom.
305
00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:45,680
And I like, answer him.
Yeah, Mom, mom, mom, can you nod
306
00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:46,840
here?
It's like, Nope, she can't
307
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:47,800
actually.
You can't.
308
00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:50,960
Yeah.
Yeah, because it's.
309
00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:53,400
Your literal constant background
noise, right?
310
00:16:53,520 --> 00:16:56,440
Percent of the time it's just
you hanging under your sanity.
311
00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:58,320
Yeah, yeah, that makes.
Sense.
312
00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:00,800
All right, Well, thanks for that
little window.
313
00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:02,320
Of course.
All right, Maya, you've got
314
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:03,960
another song here.
Yeah, I do.
315
00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:05,000
Thank you.
Thank you.
316
00:17:05,079 --> 00:17:06,440
Thank you.
I wasn't sure I was going to
317
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:09,960
come back to that seat.
OK, let's see if I can spur the
318
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:14,960
memory for you with one one
word. 2 words kick ass.
319
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:17,680
OK.
Does that bring?
320
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:19,079
Anything up for you?
Oh, I.
321
00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:20,920
Remember I had ACD.
Yeah.
322
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:25,599
So, yeah, I do remember that.
That's embarrassing.
323
00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:30,200
No, no, it's.
So funny this is from the era of
324
00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:32,920
Limewire.
OK, right.
325
00:17:33,040 --> 00:17:34,280
Yes, it.
Was that was.
326
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:39,200
The main culprit by the way, I
miss those weird visuals that
327
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:40,840
would come up when you were
listening to music.
328
00:17:40,840 --> 00:17:41,920
Do you guys know what I'm
talking about?
329
00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:44,560
Like it would just like be
colors and I think.
330
00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:48,520
It was just like the screensaver
on a really old computer, no?
331
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:51,280
Was it?
Was it pipes?
332
00:17:57,000 --> 00:18:00,440
Flying mailboxes, maybe some.
Bob ass screensavers back.
333
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:03,440
But I'm talking.
About on limewire.
334
00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:06,240
I swear it's like on Was it?
Was it like EQ style?
335
00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:09,280
So like would it like go to like
the like it would get it was.
336
00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:10,600
Badass.
I just.
337
00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:12,320
I wish we had more of that.
I don't know.
338
00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:14,160
I want to see the music while
it's playing.
339
00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:18,240
Why don't we have more of that?
Like like you.
340
00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:23,440
Could just do that, yeah.
But is that the say OK anyway,
341
00:18:23,760 --> 00:18:27,000
So yeah, this is from the days
of Limewire, which was probably
342
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:28,920
the only reason we even had a
fucking computer.
343
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:31,560
Mom, I don't know.
Were we doing anything else with
344
00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:32,040
me?
I can't think.
345
00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:34,840
Of a single other thing I did on
the computer, it was.
346
00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:39,120
Literally only for music and
pirating music and getting it
347
00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:42,160
onto C DS.
And mom, you mixed up some of
348
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:45,160
the best mixed C DS.
I actually wish that I could go
349
00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:48,520
find them like I wish that they
existed.
350
00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:50,840
So I don't know if.
You remember, but I had a whole
351
00:18:50,840 --> 00:18:53,400
collection and it was named
after different kinds of cheese.
352
00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:59,960
I do remember the Gouda scene.
I kind of forgot about the whole
353
00:18:59,960 --> 00:19:01,680
cheese theme.
Oh my God.
354
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,560
Cheddar and Swiss and let it.
Breathe.
355
00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:09,000
Oh, I forgot.
Wait, what were the cheese
356
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:09,880
mixes?
What was?
357
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:11,480
I don't remember.
I don't remember.
358
00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:15,040
I'm pretty sure Swiss cheese was
like a lot of dance music.
359
00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:16,760
Why?
I don't know.
360
00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:19,320
I couldn't tell you Holes.
In the dance floor.
361
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:24,520
I guess cheddar was like, I
think I want to say like classic
362
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:27,400
rock.
OK, what was Gouda?
363
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:30,080
Because that one.
I don't remember, I bet it.
364
00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:31,960
Was like I can't.
Remember, beyond those two, I
365
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:34,920
bet it.
Was like Otis and stuff like
366
00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:38,000
that because it it's sticking
out in my mind.
367
00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:40,000
Maybe Gouda?
Yeah.
368
00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:43,120
Yeah, and all the names are
always written in Sharpie, so I
369
00:19:43,120 --> 00:19:46,920
also like can picture you on
caps handwriting and Sharpie on
370
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:51,080
the CDs.
But Kick Ass was a mix CD that
371
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:53,440
was undoubtedly Kick Ass.
It was a lot of great music.
372
00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:55,600
It was I.
Can't remember all of the things
373
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,320
on there, I feel like there was
some.
374
00:19:57,360 --> 00:20:00,480
Good stuff maybe.
Or there's some that came from
375
00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:02,720
Limewire which I'm never going
to find again.
376
00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:05,880
I want you to know that, right?
That's so there was.
377
00:20:05,880 --> 00:20:11,120
An Anita Franco, not a pretty
girl that had the Indigo Girls
378
00:20:11,120 --> 00:20:12,720
doing guitar.
What?
379
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:18,200
No, I can't find that again.
Damn dude, no amount of YouTube
380
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,480
searching has brought that
recording back to me.
381
00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:23,040
That's actually so sad.
Wow and.
382
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:26,200
And surprising like the depths
of the I know.
383
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:30,120
That's what I'm saying is like
there are a few things that I
384
00:20:30,120 --> 00:20:31,600
have lost forever.
Wow.
385
00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:34,280
And I can't I can't seem to get
them back.
386
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:37,640
That's.
It's funny in a way, because
387
00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:40,000
you'd know that you've lost that
one forever.
388
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,480
And I know that there's probably
things that that I've lost
389
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:46,600
forever that I have no idea that
if I had heard it again, I'd be
390
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:49,840
like, Oh, yeah.
I listen to that one so much.
391
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,480
Really.
You used to hate that song.
392
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:54,120
Really.
Remember.
393
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,800
Yeah, because you didn't
understand it and all you ever
394
00:20:56,800 --> 00:20:59,600
heard is I am not a pretty girl.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
395
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:02,320
And.
So to her like a 5 year old
396
00:21:02,320 --> 00:21:05,160
girl, that's one.
Doesn't it's mean?
397
00:21:05,280 --> 00:21:06,120
Yeah.
Right.
398
00:21:06,240 --> 00:21:08,080
Well, because.
When you're a little girl,
399
00:21:09,120 --> 00:21:11,720
people compliment you by telling
you what a pretty.
400
00:21:11,720 --> 00:21:13,400
Girl, so cute.
You're so cute.
401
00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,600
Yeah.
Yeah, which fucks with you.
402
00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:20,440
It does, which is fucks you up
and later on you're like I had a
403
00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:21,000
whole.
Weird.
404
00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:24,280
It's so funny.
I don't remember not liking that
405
00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:25,320
song.
I do.
406
00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:28,240
I do.
And it is like, I knew why, but
407
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:30,600
still I was like, man, someday.
Yep.
408
00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:35,640
Someday, you know?
Yeah, and we have gone full
409
00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:40,880
circle that she has listened to
that song, understands, see.
410
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:43,320
OK, wait.
This this is jumping.
411
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:46,360
OK, hold on.
I have to finish the takes that
412
00:21:46,360 --> 00:21:49,360
we're on, but then I'll go.
Off of Bring Me.
413
00:21:49,360 --> 00:21:54,760
Back to Annie, the kick ass CD
is just hilarious because Aspen
414
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:59,200
was super young, probably 5 or 6
or something like that and she's
415
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:02,720
in the back seat of the car and
I don't seem to remember us
416
00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:05,000
being allowed to do requests
very often.
417
00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:08,760
To be honest, it was like
whatever the fuck my mom wanted,
418
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:10,040
it was.
Obviously.
419
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:11,560
She's the adult.
She gets to choose.
420
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:16,160
But Aspen was like requesting
this CD and mom's like, which
421
00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:18,080
one are you talking about?
And we couldn't figure out what
422
00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:20,680
she was saying.
And then she's like kick ass.
423
00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:23,800
You're not allowed.
To say that that's the funniest
424
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:29,440
thing ever, 'cause she was just
like, so she was the cutest.
425
00:22:29,440 --> 00:22:32,080
She was just the cute.
Was she like?
426
00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:33,560
Trying to beat around the Bush
about it.
427
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:35,920
Can't I'm?
Not sure or maybe she was just
428
00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:38,920
saying kick ass in some way that
like we couldn't tell what she
429
00:22:39,120 --> 00:22:40,440
was.
Remember.
430
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:44,720
But yeah, it was pretty cute.
And then of course, she's like
431
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:46,560
embarrassed 'cause she said a
bad word.
432
00:22:46,560 --> 00:22:49,760
But then it's like, well, mom,
you named the CD, I guess.
433
00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:52,480
How were we supposed to request
that CD 'cause it was also
434
00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:54,040
really good?
So yeah.
435
00:22:54,040 --> 00:22:58,080
Wait, so but you said
embarrassing when she first said
436
00:22:58,080 --> 00:23:00,000
well?
What I remember is that the
437
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:04,280
cover of that CD was nothing but
a picture of my booty.
438
00:23:05,840 --> 00:23:09,440
I guess you guys didn't know
that I had actually made it for
439
00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:12,400
somebody, no.
Way mom.
440
00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:15,240
That is fucking legendary.
Wow, so do you even.
441
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:19,320
Like what I don't?
Remember, I think I just had a I
442
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:21,920
had a picture of SO.
Cute.
443
00:23:21,920 --> 00:23:23,000
And I had to.
Zoom in.
444
00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:27,760
Just that.
Didn't see any of me, Yeah.
445
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:30,920
That's it's sort of funny
because we were just talking
446
00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:34,200
about like making a mix tape for
somebody that you like, you
447
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:36,720
know, giving them a mix tape or
mixed realizing.
448
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:38,960
What?
This is what the world is
449
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:40,920
missing, you guys.
This is what?
450
00:23:41,440 --> 00:23:44,200
I think I think today that we
can bring it back.
451
00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:48,560
But in in this case, you know,
we were also talking about how,
452
00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:51,240
oh, maybe it's a hint that we
like somebody, but it's
453
00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:55,560
actually, you know, maybe not.
But if you put your butt on it,
454
00:23:55,560 --> 00:23:57,080
I think that's pretty
straightforward.
455
00:23:57,120 --> 00:23:58,480
It's pretty.
Straightforward.
456
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:01,320
Yeah, it was a good picture.
Nice mom, this is way.
457
00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:04,080
Back in my youth, right?
And sometimes I think fondly of
458
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:08,960
that picture.
So so so that that CD takes you
459
00:24:08,960 --> 00:24:12,040
back to the cover art it does.
It takes me back to a booty that
460
00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:15,840
was 20 years younger.
Back to your backside.
461
00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:18,280
Take me back to the backside,
but I.
462
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:21,960
Am interested to know what you
pulled off of that CD because I
463
00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:24,400
can't remember all of the songs
on it you know?
464
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:27,840
I could be wrong here, but I'm
wondering if Aspen was
465
00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:32,640
requesting it because it had
like a live on there maybe?
466
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:35,680
It doesn't seem right.
It doesn't seem.
467
00:24:35,680 --> 00:24:38,240
Right to me.
It also might have.
468
00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:42,480
I know we did really have fun
listening to Elias, yes.
469
00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:44,320
Do you think maybe that was on
there?
470
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:47,160
Maybe.
Maybe or.
471
00:24:49,360 --> 00:24:52,040
This and this could be so
random, but for some reason
472
00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:54,280
cheap trick is coming to mind
too.
473
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:55,880
I want.
You to want me so.
474
00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:58,160
That that.
I'm sure that was on there.
475
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:02,280
So.
So may I ask who it was for?
476
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:05,120
Like a guy I dated.
Yeah, OK.
477
00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:07,680
We won't name him just because
I'm not going to give him
478
00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:11,160
credit, OK.
That's fine, that's all, but
479
00:25:11,320 --> 00:25:15,400
does maybe conjuring like the
memory of him in that time put
480
00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:17,280
any more songs on the CD that
you would think of?
481
00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:22,840
The thing is, is when you first
said it, I almost had it, like I
482
00:25:22,840 --> 00:25:27,960
almost had like a group of songs
and I remember Ani DiFranco, but
483
00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:29,400
I can't remember the rest of
them.
484
00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:31,800
See that's.
Why I'm wondering maybe if oh oh
485
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:34,840
oh, you know what I bet was on
there carry you.
486
00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:39,840
I bet dispatch, yeah.
You've probably never heard this
487
00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:41,560
song that was.
My dispatcher.
488
00:25:41,560 --> 00:25:42,800
I know some.
Dispatch, do you?
489
00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:46,240
That's good, this song.
I don't know a lot of it, but
490
00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:50,160
some of it.
Such a good song.
491
00:25:51,040 --> 00:25:54,840
It is a good sign and.
Like down there on the list of
492
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:58,680
their stuff in terms of
popularity, but.
493
00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:58,200
It's funny 'cause their new
album cover has butt cheeks.
494
00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:00,520
I can't see.
I probably can't.
495
00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:02,320
It's.
Like he's in the distance, but
496
00:27:02,360 --> 00:27:03,440
yeah.
Bare.
497
00:27:03,440 --> 00:27:10,120
Butt cheeks.
I feel like the music that you
498
00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:15,360
just accidentally raised us on
probably instilled a lot of
499
00:27:15,360 --> 00:27:17,920
emotional depth into me that I
didn't even understand at the
500
00:27:17,920 --> 00:27:20,360
time, 'cause there's all these
good songs and so many of them
501
00:27:20,360 --> 00:27:23,200
are about heartbreak and all
kinds of shit and all kinds of.
502
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:24,600
Stuff.
Understand that when you're a
503
00:27:24,600 --> 00:27:28,440
kid, but maybe it goes in there
somewhere.
504
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:30,480
Yeah, I.
Mean kids are little sponges.
505
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,720
Absolutely.
And I always knew that.
506
00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:39,240
And I mean, I can't say that I
like consciously crafted your
507
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:41,200
musical environment.
I did not.
508
00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:43,560
But I knew that you would soak
up what I listened to.
509
00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:46,840
And.
And I thought it was important.
510
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:48,880
Yeah.
Well, and you have always been
511
00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:55,320
against music that's like
objectifying or vulgar for the
512
00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:58,320
sake of vulgarity.
Like, not that you are against
513
00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:03,040
bad language in any way, but.
But but.
514
00:28:03,040 --> 00:28:06,040
One thing I remember from my
childhood is you instilling this
515
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:11,240
idea of like, you can cuss, but
you can't have the the F word be
516
00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:14,120
your entire vocabulary because
you're going to sound stupid and
517
00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:15,800
it's also not going to pack a
punch.
518
00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:21,320
So think about what you say like
that was more like the way that
519
00:28:21,320 --> 00:28:23,800
you.
Words matter, yeah, and that's
520
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:25,640
so.
Fair, and I also appreciate that
521
00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:28,280
it didn't.
I didn't try to expunge fuck
522
00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:32,120
from my vocabulary because it is
really useful and it serves a
523
00:28:32,120 --> 00:28:34,520
great purpose.
You know, you know the.
524
00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:37,360
Whole song about it.
What?
525
00:28:37,360 --> 00:28:42,320
Song, I think it's called the
word fuck or it might just be
526
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:44,600
called fuck.
It's by the Gaslamp killer.
527
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,800
You should really check that
out.
528
00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:49,440
It's quite good actually.
Think she's?
529
00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:53,920
Going to find it right now.
I've never heard of the Gaslamp.
530
00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:56,120
Oh my.
Gosh, he's got some wonderful
531
00:28:56,120 --> 00:28:57,920
songs.
You know, he's called that
532
00:28:57,920 --> 00:29:01,400
because he used to work the
Gaslamp District in California,
533
00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:04,080
and he was famous for killing
the vibe.
534
00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:08,880
Yeah, what a.
Great.
535
00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:11,120
I know name.
Actually.
536
00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:14,200
Perhaps one of the most
interesting words in the English
537
00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:19,360
language today is the word fuck.
Out of all of the English words
538
00:29:19,360 --> 00:29:22,760
that begin with the letter F,
fuck is the only word that is
539
00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:27,880
referred to as the F word.
It's the one magical word just
540
00:29:27,880 --> 00:29:32,160
by its sound, can describe pain,
pleasure, hate, and love.
541
00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:36,520
In English, fuck falls into many
grammatical categories.
542
00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:40,880
As a transitive verb, for
instance, John fucked Shirley.
543
00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:44,560
As an intransitive verb, Shirley
fucks.
544
00:29:45,280 --> 00:29:47,120
It's meaning's not always
sexual.
545
00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:50,640
It can be used as an adjective,
such as John's doing all the
546
00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:54,680
fucking work.
As part of an adverb, Shirley
547
00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:58,880
talks too fucking much.
As an adverb enhancing an
548
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:01,920
adjective, Shirley is fucking
beautiful.
549
00:30:02,640 --> 00:30:07,920
As a noun, I don't give a fuck.
As part of a word abso fucking
550
00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:13,320
lutely or in fucking credible
and as almost every word in a
551
00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:15,600
sentence.
Fuck the fucking fuckers.
552
00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:17,760
It's like that.
Scene in Boondock Saints.
553
00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:20,880
You ever see that?
Not in a very long time, OK.
554
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:26,120
Yeah, yeah, a guy just bursts
into a room and and just
555
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:30,560
FFFFFFFFF uses it in all sorts
of different ways and then a guy
556
00:30:30,560 --> 00:30:31,880
responds.
Certainly illustrates the
557
00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:37,280
diversity of the word that's.
So funny dude, I love all its
558
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:40,320
uses and I didn't realize
whatever it said about it's the
559
00:30:40,320 --> 00:30:44,000
only one that you what that we
are all referring to when we say
560
00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:46,520
the F word And I had never
thought about that before, but
561
00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:49,160
that is it shows you how
powerful it is.
562
00:30:49,600 --> 00:30:52,400
Fascinating.
OK, wait, I was going to come
563
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:54,160
back to Ani but I have to
remember why.
564
00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:56,720
What were we talking about?
Oh, yes.
565
00:30:56,760 --> 00:31:02,400
OK, so Ani DiFranco was someone
I I have memories of you playing
566
00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:05,240
her, obviously, but from before
I remember because I didn't
567
00:31:05,240 --> 00:31:09,320
remember not liking that song.
So you've been listening to her
568
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:12,160
from day one?
Did was there a lot of time that
569
00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:14,400
I didn't like her?
No, OK.
570
00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:17,640
And I don't, I think, I think it
was just like one time in the
571
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:19,840
car that you made a comment
about that song.
572
00:31:19,880 --> 00:31:22,000
Yeah.
And that makes sense 'cause I'm
573
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:25,080
just like, you know, you're
turning around the words in your
574
00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:27,320
mind, trying to figure out what
it means and, and I.
575
00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:33,360
Didn't just play Ani DiFranco, I
sang it like full force.
576
00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:36,160
Speakers up full volume they
were.
577
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:38,480
Exposed to that the whole time?
Yeah, you.
578
00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:41,280
Didn't you didn't filter
yourself my?
579
00:31:41,280 --> 00:31:44,640
Playlist was usually based upon
what I wanted to sing that day.
580
00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:48,640
That's great, yeah.
Not that I can sing.
581
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:50,120
No, I was.
I want to make that clear.
582
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:51,920
I can't.
Believe you just fucking beat me
583
00:31:51,920 --> 00:31:53,680
to it.
I'm literally coming out of my
584
00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:55,880
mouth were the words.
That's why I know you actually
585
00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:58,360
have a really good singing voice
even though you think you don't.
586
00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:02,240
I well, you do I.
Don't have an ear like a cater
587
00:32:02,240 --> 00:32:04,000
though.
That's just, that's the part
588
00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:06,440
that you just have to train in
like that.
589
00:32:06,520 --> 00:32:11,160
Like yes, you're not a well
trained vocalist but you have a
590
00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:14,440
good voice I think.
It's just years of imitating.
591
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:17,280
Well, yeah, because you get
obsessed with songs and then you
592
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:19,760
try to sing it exactly the way
that you sing it and I feel.
593
00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:24,720
So much more validated because
it was super recently that I
594
00:32:24,720 --> 00:32:29,360
read something about ADHD people
have a tendency to play a song
595
00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:33,720
on repeat and like you just get,
it just gets stuck in your brain
596
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:37,000
and you can't let it go and you
just, you're obsessed for
597
00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:40,520
whatever chunk of time and then
you move on and may never go
598
00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:41,760
back to it again.
So.
599
00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:48,960
Please pardon this interruption,
we just wanted to encourage you
600
00:32:48,960 --> 00:32:52,760
to follow us on whatever
podcasting platform you use.
601
00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:55,080
It helps others discover our
show.
602
00:32:55,400 --> 00:32:58,400
You can look forward to a new
episode on the 1st of the month
603
00:32:58,520 --> 00:33:01,080
every month.
If you want to hear an uncut
604
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:04,320
interview two weeks early, join
our Patreon.
605
00:33:04,600 --> 00:33:07,200
Now back to your regular
scheduled programming.
606
00:33:09,840 --> 00:33:13,680
Oh, OK, so let's circle back to
Ani real quick because I was
607
00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:17,560
raised on Ani, but I actually
feel like I remember the time
608
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:22,840
when I started to like Ani
DiFranco for myself and I have
609
00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:26,280
one that takes me back.
Related to that.
610
00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:28,640
I feel like it might have been
one of the first times that we
611
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:32,440
like really listened to her
music and actually talked about
612
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:34,440
like her music and what she
meant to you.
613
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:38,040
And I feel like it was when
sometime around going to Lake
614
00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:40,520
Powell because we just like were
in the cool.
615
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:42,720
Maybe.
Yeah, that actually kind of
616
00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:47,920
sounds right, I think.
That like, yeah, maybe Aspen had
617
00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:50,200
to be subjected to that too.
I'm not sure.
618
00:33:50,200 --> 00:33:52,520
But I almost think maybe for
some reason it was just you and
619
00:33:52,520 --> 00:33:54,120
me in the car.
Could have been.
620
00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:56,600
And that's why we just did,
like, a whole Ani DiFranco
621
00:33:56,600 --> 00:33:58,080
thing.
And we listened to her like, the
622
00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:01,680
whole way.
And yeah, like, we actually
623
00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:03,960
talked about her more.
And then I think maybe that was
624
00:34:03,960 --> 00:34:07,960
when I actually decided to,
like, listen to her more for
625
00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:12,199
myself and, like, dig into it.
I think it was around that time
626
00:34:12,199 --> 00:34:18,360
that I had this summer where I
was at grandma's house, and one
627
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:22,360
song from Ani DiFranco was
living rent free in my fucking
628
00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:24,320
mind.
And I couldn't stop listening to
629
00:34:24,320 --> 00:34:29,440
it on repeat from her album
Living in Clinton Live.
630
00:34:29,440 --> 00:35:05,720
I'm.
This is one of the only artists
631
00:35:05,720 --> 00:35:12,720
I do love her life albums but
with a lot of people I don't.
632
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:17,720
It just depends.
But yeah, anyway, I'm obsessed.
633
00:35:17,720 --> 00:35:21,800
I was obsessed with this song
and I started my long career of
634
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:26,000
hearing loss because of this
song 'cause I had like a stereo
635
00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:27,800
system.
I think I probably got it for
636
00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:30,360
Christmas or something.
At one point had a stereo system
637
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:33,960
that had two separate speakers
and like the little CD spot, and
638
00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:36,400
it was like separate.
So then I would lay on the floor
639
00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:39,640
and I'd put both of these
speakers on either side of my
640
00:35:39,640 --> 00:35:41,240
fucking head.
Jumbo.
641
00:35:41,240 --> 00:35:45,400
Headphones.
And listen to this song and a
642
00:35:45,400 --> 00:35:49,320
lot of other songs, but this
song in particular, because
643
00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:54,080
something about this live
recording just like trapped my
644
00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:56,320
imagination.
And I felt like I could see her
645
00:35:56,320 --> 00:35:59,360
on the stage.
And I feel like I can see the
646
00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:03,080
orchestra and it's just so
intimate somehow.
647
00:36:03,680 --> 00:36:05,880
And I don't know, it's just
which I.
648
00:36:05,880 --> 00:36:08,640
Feel is not unlike how she
actually is on stage.
649
00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:11,520
It's true.
It is weirdly intimate.
650
00:36:12,320 --> 00:36:14,520
It is she's.
Just good at that.
651
00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:18,720
She's she's a wonderful
performer and she has a great
652
00:36:18,920 --> 00:36:23,440
stage presence in the way she
talks to the crowd and.
653
00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:25,800
Yeah.
And just the way she sings, I
654
00:36:25,800 --> 00:36:27,080
know.
There's a lot of heart.
655
00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:28,720
In it, yeah.
Yeah.
656
00:36:28,720 --> 00:36:30,320
And actually, that was something
that came up when we were
657
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:35,720
talking with Todd about recorded
music or studio music versus
658
00:36:35,720 --> 00:36:38,440
live music.
And we did say that part of the
659
00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:42,320
reason that maybe Ana Defranco
is so good on the live
660
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:45,480
recordings is because it is her
and the guitar and it is just
661
00:36:45,520 --> 00:36:49,160
that raw.
You get the emotion and.
662
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:51,200
And that's the way it's meant to
be heard.
663
00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:52,560
Yeah.
Poetry.
664
00:36:52,920 --> 00:36:55,840
Poetry.
Yeah, whereas like a live
665
00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:59,440
rendition of a song that was
perfected in the studio might
666
00:36:59,440 --> 00:37:02,560
actually not sound right as
good.
667
00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:05,240
Well, and it's live, Yeah, to.
Me though that's.
668
00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:08,560
The mark of a good artist.
Yeah, I know.
669
00:37:10,880 --> 00:37:15,400
You should be better life, in my
opinion, because of this,
670
00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:18,160
because of the interaction,
because, yeah, you know, it's a
671
00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:21,840
spontaneous moment as opposed to
something that's crafted in a
672
00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:25,560
studio.
So to me, it is just, I don't
673
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:27,440
know, by definition, supposed to
be better.
674
00:37:27,560 --> 00:37:30,760
Yeah.
That's like that other Ani
675
00:37:30,760 --> 00:37:36,680
DiFranco lyric that had come up.
Yes, of the music, what was it
676
00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:39,720
is.
People used to make records, as
677
00:37:39,720 --> 00:37:43,360
in the record of an event, the
event of people playing music in
678
00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:47,800
a room and then it that goes on.
But I love that because yeah, I,
679
00:37:47,840 --> 00:37:49,760
I don't know that it just keeps
coming up.
680
00:37:49,760 --> 00:37:54,360
The music is this like ephemeral
experience.
681
00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:58,960
But then we do record it and we
do bottle it and we do transmit
682
00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:01,160
it and consume it and all of
that stuff.
683
00:38:01,160 --> 00:38:06,040
And but then you there are
people like this that keep so
684
00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:10,200
much of their heart in their
truth, in their writing and in
685
00:38:10,200 --> 00:38:13,840
their creative process.
And then it hits a listener
686
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:17,880
straight in their heart with all
their lived experience because
687
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:19,840
there is so much real emotion to
it.
688
00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:21,520
And.
I don't know.
689
00:38:22,720 --> 00:38:24,480
Yeah.
Leonard Cohen is on that same
690
00:38:24,480 --> 00:38:28,600
level for me because he's much
the same way.
691
00:38:28,720 --> 00:38:31,120
Listening to him is like
listening to a poem.
692
00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:39,240
In fact some of them like Ani he
has like spoken poems on on his
693
00:38:39,240 --> 00:38:40,440
albums.
Do you?
694
00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:43,440
Is there a Leonard Cohen song
that sends out the most for?
695
00:38:43,440 --> 00:38:47,680
Well, I mean, Hallelujah,
everybody knows that one, you
696
00:38:47,680 --> 00:38:52,280
know, and, and what's his name
Stole it, but I don't think it's
697
00:38:52,280 --> 00:38:55,200
better.
It's not better his.
698
00:38:55,200 --> 00:38:59,600
Voice just kills me.
Deep, guttural voice.
699
00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:42,520
There was a secret chord
He has a poem, I don't know what
700
00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:45,920
the name of it is, but he says
1000 kisses deep.
701
00:39:46,840 --> 00:39:51,160
Who but you would let me in 1000
kisses deep and I just That's a
702
00:39:51,160 --> 00:39:54,920
beautiful line it.
Is yeah, that's like that's a, a
703
00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:58,640
line you want to hear, like to
your, you want to be told that.
704
00:39:59,240 --> 00:40:04,240
Yeah, that poem is unbelievable.
Yeah, 1000 kisses deep.
705
00:40:04,920 --> 00:40:07,920
Wow.
And that takes me back actually,
706
00:40:08,120 --> 00:40:11,000
'cause I feel like I haven't,
Leonard.
707
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:16,280
Cohen takes me back to Howard
because that's that's who
708
00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:18,920
introduced me to Leonard Cohen.
Wait.
709
00:40:19,240 --> 00:40:20,880
No way.
Yeah.
710
00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:24,240
Because I thought that this was
something that was maybe more
711
00:40:24,240 --> 00:40:26,800
from your childhood.
No, that's from Howard.
712
00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:28,280
Wow.
So.
713
00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:32,040
Howard was someone that she
worked for kind of home.
714
00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:36,120
Care type, yeah, so it was
paraplegic, partially
715
00:40:36,240 --> 00:40:40,080
paraplegic.
He had very limited use of his
716
00:40:40,080 --> 00:40:42,560
hands and arms, but.
Yeah.
717
00:40:42,720 --> 00:40:45,120
And Howard was really, really
into music.
718
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:49,080
In fact, Howard had a Facebook
page and every single day he
719
00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:52,760
would do artist of the day.
Usually it was country because
720
00:40:52,760 --> 00:40:55,960
he was really into country
music, But and he had written a
721
00:40:55,960 --> 00:41:00,920
song and he used to get rights
for that song.
722
00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:03,200
He wasn't supposed to tell me
who it was.
723
00:41:03,240 --> 00:41:05,960
Wow.
But anyway, yeah, he actually
724
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:10,000
wrote music.
Wow, I did not know that.
725
00:41:10,000 --> 00:41:15,000
I did remember that he was into
music because we did that big
726
00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:19,120
karaoke party for his birthday.
He loved karaoke, Yeah.
727
00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:24,280
But I had no idea that he was
that big into music He used to.
728
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:26,200
Talk about music all the time.
Wow.
729
00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:28,080
That's so cool.
So did.
730
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:30,200
Leonard, Leonard Cohen hit
pretty hard.
731
00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:33,760
Like immediately for you it did.
And the lyrics, I think
732
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,200
immediately.
And also his voice and just the
733
00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:41,680
in the simplicity of it.
You know, interestingly enough,
734
00:41:41,680 --> 00:41:44,120
as much as we've talked about
Leonard Cohen and Anya Defranco
735
00:41:44,120 --> 00:41:49,800
and how simple and folky and all
that is, the song I was going to
736
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:53,120
pick is the exact opposite.
Oh, really?
737
00:41:53,200 --> 00:41:57,920
Yeah, great.
So that I just, I find that
738
00:41:57,920 --> 00:41:59,960
really, yeah, interesting.
No that.
739
00:41:59,960 --> 00:42:03,840
Is actually because but I.
Also think I've come to realize
740
00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:08,040
that that some of the music that
my mom's music that I listened
741
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:10,680
to, which I did the same thing
that you did, where I would lay
742
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:14,400
down on the floor and I'd take
those two speakers and I laid my
743
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:17,320
head right in there and I would
listen to some of this stuff.
744
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:21,080
Because she was into weird shit.
I mean, it was a lot of
745
00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:25,320
psychedelic rock, a lot of
progressive rock, a lot of, you
746
00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:28,960
know, Emerson, Lincoln Palmer,
Moody Blues, Pink Floyd and
747
00:42:29,080 --> 00:42:32,040
stuff like.
That's my parents, yeah.
748
00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:34,720
So that's that's what I grew up
with.
749
00:42:34,720 --> 00:42:38,080
And Emerson Lincoln Palmer is
something I still listen to this
750
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:40,600
this very day, No.
Way.
751
00:42:40,720 --> 00:42:43,960
Yeah, I need to hear some of
this because I have no idea what
752
00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:47,960
you're talking about the album.
Will be trilogy K and it's the
753
00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:49,560
first song OK.
I think this is.
754
00:42:49,560 --> 00:44:13,700
Going to take me back too.
We can't listen to the whole
755
00:44:13,700 --> 00:44:17,220
thing because it's like a 7
minute song as a lot of like
756
00:44:17,540 --> 00:44:19,500
prog rock and and stuff like
that.
757
00:44:19,540 --> 00:44:22,420
They were like they were.
Getting excited about.
758
00:44:22,420 --> 00:44:24,780
Well, they were.
Stoned and they were just going
759
00:44:24,780 --> 00:44:28,200
for it and you know.
Totally.
760
00:44:28,760 --> 00:44:31,520
Well, and I think at a certain
point it probably started to be
761
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:36,200
cool to make a song that was the
wrong amount of time for radio
762
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:39,280
at a time when everybody was
trying to make the radio hits.
763
00:44:39,880 --> 00:44:43,800
I feel like it became a thing to
go outside of that.
764
00:44:43,800 --> 00:44:45,960
I don't know, I could be.
I don't even.
765
00:44:45,960 --> 00:44:50,000
Know if they cared about really
the radio I don't know because
766
00:44:51,880 --> 00:44:56,360
like and I also think that I
don't know perhaps it was my
767
00:44:56,360 --> 00:45:00,360
first like contact hive because
she would sit at the kitchen
768
00:45:00,360 --> 00:45:04,520
table and she'd be smoking weed
and playing solitaire with like
769
00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:06,840
actual cards and listening to
this music.
770
00:45:06,840 --> 00:45:08,600
Oh the fuck.
Yeah.
771
00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:08,760
Yeah.
Oh.
772
00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:11,240
My God, I I would have hung out
with her.
773
00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:14,200
Sounds like a good afternoon
you.
774
00:45:14,440 --> 00:45:18,520
Know when you're a 5 year old
kid you're just like, what are
775
00:45:18,520 --> 00:45:23,320
we listening to but the she she
had this huge album collection
776
00:45:23,320 --> 00:45:27,240
and I just remember I used to
just zone out on those album
777
00:45:27,240 --> 00:45:30,720
covers because you know those
were just as trippy as the music
778
00:45:30,720 --> 00:45:32,440
was totally.
So.
779
00:45:32,680 --> 00:45:35,200
Like some of that artwork and
stuff just blew my mind.
780
00:45:35,320 --> 00:45:37,920
I mean, I couldn't, I couldn't
understand what was going on on
781
00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:40,640
the Pink Floyd album cover
because, you know, they're
782
00:45:40,640 --> 00:45:43,040
grinding people at some point.
And I'm just like, I don't, I
783
00:45:43,040 --> 00:45:46,640
don't understand any of this.
But I really like the music.
784
00:45:48,600 --> 00:45:50,600
Wow, that is really cool.
Tell me.
785
00:45:50,600 --> 00:45:53,240
You that she had a Jethro Tull
album?
786
00:45:53,320 --> 00:45:55,080
Absolutely.
Yeah, yeah, he had.
787
00:45:55,080 --> 00:45:57,520
Some great artwork.
Also yes.
788
00:45:58,040 --> 00:46:02,000
OK, I.
Remember like the hour long
789
00:46:02,000 --> 00:46:07,320
songs on the Yes album This is
This is where my music starts.
790
00:46:07,760 --> 00:46:08,760
Wow.
Yeah.
791
00:46:09,360 --> 00:46:12,440
But I also from her.
Record collection stick stuck up
792
00:46:12,440 --> 00:46:14,640
to you, Anything this and Moody
Blues.
793
00:46:14,640 --> 00:46:18,360
Probably the most, oh, let's not
forget Neil Diamond.
794
00:46:18,440 --> 00:46:20,680
I do remember there was a lot of
Neil Diamond in there.
795
00:46:20,960 --> 00:46:23,520
She was nuts about the Jazz
Singer and that.
796
00:46:23,520 --> 00:46:26,680
Was the point at which you sort
of lost me as far as my that
797
00:46:26,680 --> 00:46:28,880
takes me back and listening to
music with my parents.
798
00:46:28,880 --> 00:46:31,960
Cause yeah, it was a lot of this
kind of stuff, a lot of the
799
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:35,000
bands that you just mentioned.
But no Neil Diamond.
800
00:46:35,000 --> 00:46:36,120
No, Neil.
Diamond.
801
00:46:36,240 --> 00:46:39,080
There was there was a lot.
There was some weird things
802
00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:40,760
thrown in there.
CCR.
803
00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:43,080
Oh yeah.
Oh yeah.
804
00:46:43,160 --> 00:46:46,680
Mom then carried over into Maya,
bringing Big Time I.
805
00:46:46,760 --> 00:46:49,800
Always listen to them still.
Is this a good movie?
806
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:50,440
Wow.
Yeah.
807
00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:52,200
Totally.
This totally takes me back.
808
00:46:52,520 --> 00:46:54,120
This is.
Like this was probably like
809
00:46:54,440 --> 00:47:30,820
their radio play song.
I used to listen to Long
810
00:47:30,820 --> 00:47:34,380
Distance Voyager and there was a
song on there called Veteran
811
00:47:34,380 --> 00:47:37,580
Cosmic Rocker.
Like as a kid, like the visuals
812
00:47:37,580 --> 00:47:40,100
that came to me from that song
were just awesome.
813
00:47:40,180 --> 00:47:44,920
I just, I loved that song.
It's interesting Moody Blue
814
00:47:44,920 --> 00:47:47,960
stuck out to you big time from
what she listened to, but that
815
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:51,640
one didn't carry over like I've
never really heard well.
816
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:54,280
No, it didn't.
You're right.
817
00:47:54,320 --> 00:47:57,720
And I think there was a huge
chunk of time that I didn't, I
818
00:47:57,720 --> 00:48:02,480
didn't listen to that music.
I don't know why now all of a
819
00:48:02,480 --> 00:48:04,240
sudden.
And part of it's just it's
820
00:48:04,240 --> 00:48:07,640
accessibility on Spotify, you
know, that I could find these
821
00:48:07,640 --> 00:48:13,280
things and dig them up.
But I, I do really like Emerson
822
00:48:13,280 --> 00:48:15,440
Lake and Palmer.
I, I actually still genuinely
823
00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:19,640
like, there is nobody alive now
that still likes that music.
824
00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:24,360
It's not good.
I, I can't like tell you that
825
00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:27,160
musically it's amazing.
And that they were, you know,
826
00:48:27,160 --> 00:48:29,000
musicians that didn't get enough
credit.
827
00:48:29,000 --> 00:48:30,480
I don't think any of those
things.
828
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:32,440
My dad.
Probably still has that album
829
00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:34,080
hanging on his wall right now.
Yeah.
830
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:39,600
Oh.
Can I choose This just happens
831
00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:44,120
to be a Neil Diamond song that
takes me back to Pulp.
832
00:48:44,120 --> 00:48:44,840
Fiction.
Pulp Fiction.
833
00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:48,200
Every single time.
Iconic, Yeah.
834
00:49:03,280 --> 00:49:06,120
is.
Wait, but can I can I ask like
835
00:49:06,120 --> 00:49:10,280
so so when you hear like those
Moody Blues songs or or Emerson
836
00:49:10,280 --> 00:49:13,080
like and Palmer like, does it
take you back to something in
837
00:49:13,080 --> 00:49:15,560
particular?
So so your your mom sitting
838
00:49:15,560 --> 00:49:17,440
there playing cards.
I definitely.
839
00:49:17,840 --> 00:49:21,760
I definitely always get like
that kind of, excuse me, that
840
00:49:21,760 --> 00:49:27,440
kind of image and vibe and and,
you know, like not to get too
841
00:49:27,600 --> 00:49:30,320
deep or personal, but I don't
have a lot of fond memories of
842
00:49:30,320 --> 00:49:33,160
my mom.
And, and just I can't say that
843
00:49:33,160 --> 00:49:37,640
these are nostalgic memories.
It's kind of odd, but I was
844
00:49:37,640 --> 00:49:40,800
thinking about it like thinking
about, you know, having to talk
845
00:49:40,800 --> 00:49:44,680
about it on this.
And I thought perhaps those are
846
00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:46,520
some of the fondest memories of
my mom.
847
00:49:46,600 --> 00:49:49,520
Yeah.
Is because it's, you know, it
848
00:49:49,520 --> 00:49:50,840
was simple.
Yeah.
849
00:49:50,840 --> 00:49:52,760
Nothing bad was actually
happening.
850
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:56,080
She wasn't, you know, whacked
out on drugs in her room for
851
00:49:56,080 --> 00:49:58,360
three days in a row.
She was just sitting at the
852
00:49:58,360 --> 00:50:00,720
table getting high, playing
solitaire.
853
00:50:00,840 --> 00:50:02,760
Yeah, That was relatively
normal.
854
00:50:02,760 --> 00:50:05,120
Yeah.
Music and books are two things
855
00:50:05,120 --> 00:50:09,600
that I got from my mom, really
the only two things that I will
856
00:50:09,880 --> 00:50:10,880
take.
So I.
857
00:50:10,880 --> 00:50:13,920
Did not know that.
So is that where your love of
858
00:50:13,920 --> 00:50:16,680
books started?
Oh yeah, she used.
859
00:50:17,040 --> 00:50:19,440
To She was a member of the
Science Fiction Book Club.
860
00:50:20,240 --> 00:50:22,320
So every month we got a new
sci-fi book.
861
00:50:22,680 --> 00:50:27,440
It was a lot of like Piers
Anthony and Arthur C Clarke and
862
00:50:28,400 --> 00:50:32,320
Isaac Asimov, the Lord of the
Rings cause fantasy was in there
863
00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:34,600
too.
So that's where I started.
864
00:50:34,600 --> 00:50:37,080
And my brother was a reader
also.
865
00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:40,040
And they would talk about books
sometimes and I'd feel really
866
00:50:40,040 --> 00:50:43,320
jealous because, you know, I
wasn't quite old enough to read
867
00:50:43,320 --> 00:50:46,000
at that level.
And so I just wanted to be able
868
00:50:46,000 --> 00:50:49,080
to read and talk about the same
things they did.
869
00:50:49,560 --> 00:50:51,720
Well, so yeah, wow, that is
cool.
870
00:50:51,720 --> 00:50:54,800
I didn't really know that that
was a bonding thing like or a
871
00:50:54,800 --> 00:50:57,600
memory of your mom for you.
Well, I.
872
00:50:57,600 --> 00:51:01,360
Mean it started out really I
think it just because they were
873
00:51:01,360 --> 00:51:05,120
there and because I lived in a
very rural area so there was
874
00:51:05,120 --> 00:51:07,760
nothing to do, right.
So there were literally 3
875
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:11,160
channels on the television to
watch and usually there wasn't
876
00:51:11,160 --> 00:51:14,080
anything on them, you know, so
it's either go wander in the
877
00:51:14,080 --> 00:51:17,080
woods or read a book.
I mean those were pretty much my
878
00:51:17,360 --> 00:51:20,040
my 2 choices and I so I did both
of those and the.
879
00:51:20,040 --> 00:51:21,880
Card game solitaire.
That's right in the name.
880
00:51:21,880 --> 00:51:23,560
You can't even participate.
Yeah.
881
00:51:23,560 --> 00:51:26,600
Well, you know, I mean I did
used to play my own solitaire.
882
00:51:27,760 --> 00:51:29,560
So you would also smoke
cigarettes at the same time?
883
00:51:29,960 --> 00:51:32,880
Oh, because this.
Was that era where people just
884
00:51:32,880 --> 00:51:36,240
smoke cigarettes all the time?
Right, how did you even achieve
885
00:51:36,240 --> 00:51:38,440
that?
Did she like 2 handed or what?
886
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:40,680
I don't remember.
Spliffs there were.
887
00:51:40,720 --> 00:51:45,200
There was a series like Spliffs
when she never did spliffs and I
888
00:51:45,200 --> 00:51:47,000
don't remember her smoking
joints.
889
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:49,640
Interesting.
But.
890
00:51:49,880 --> 00:51:52,560
Though maybe she did, I just
honestly I don't remember well
891
00:51:52,560 --> 00:51:54,080
'cause you.
Were young at that I was.
892
00:51:54,080 --> 00:51:57,120
Super young and and it's not
like these things were very
893
00:51:57,120 --> 00:52:00,560
noticeable or notable because it
was very common.
894
00:52:00,640 --> 00:52:01,840
Totally.
To me it was.
895
00:52:01,840 --> 00:52:03,680
Like, there's cigarettes and
then there's the other thing.
896
00:52:03,680 --> 00:52:07,360
They smoke totally, you know,
And my aunts and uncles smelled
897
00:52:07,360 --> 00:52:09,360
like weed, too.
I didn't know that that was weed
898
00:52:09,360 --> 00:52:12,080
until I was older and I was.
Like that whole time?
899
00:52:12,240 --> 00:52:12,960
Right.
Yeah.
900
00:52:13,360 --> 00:52:16,120
Yeah, my whole family, yeah.
Totally.
901
00:52:16,360 --> 00:52:18,280
Yeah, I know it.
It is funny.
902
00:52:18,280 --> 00:52:19,560
Yeah.
And you, you walk into another
903
00:52:19,560 --> 00:52:21,120
house and you're like, why does
this smell like my uncle's van?
904
00:52:21,120 --> 00:52:24,920
Exactly.
That is so bolder.
905
00:52:27,040 --> 00:52:29,080
Yeah.
And in general, as a kid, it's
906
00:52:29,080 --> 00:52:31,160
just like adults doing adult
things.
907
00:52:32,280 --> 00:52:33,640
You kind of or just like
whatever.
908
00:52:33,640 --> 00:52:35,680
Well, it's not.
I'm not allowed to do it, so I'm
909
00:52:35,680 --> 00:52:37,400
not even going to pay attention
or whatever it is.
910
00:52:37,760 --> 00:52:43,560
Yeah, yeah, yeah 'cause how old,
If you don't mind me asking, how
911
00:52:43,560 --> 00:52:45,680
old were you when your mom had
the car?
912
00:52:45,840 --> 00:52:48,520
No, your mom had went through
her car accident when you were
913
00:52:48,520 --> 00:52:50,680
born before.
I was born, she was pregnant
914
00:52:50,680 --> 00:52:52,080
with me.
I always.
915
00:52:52,080 --> 00:52:55,440
Fucking forget about that, yeah.
So she died twice, that is.
916
00:52:55,440 --> 00:52:59,200
Crazy mom.
And how far along was she with
917
00:52:59,200 --> 00:52:59,920
not?
Very.
918
00:53:00,040 --> 00:53:03,760
Oh, OK, Not very.
I was born in September, and it
919
00:53:03,760 --> 00:53:06,400
was probably more like
springtime when she had the
920
00:53:06,440 --> 00:53:07,160
accident.
OK.
921
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:12,800
So it probably didn't really.
Like yeah, it probably.
922
00:53:12,800 --> 00:53:14,800
Didn't affect you very much I
think.
923
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:19,120
Not, I mean her dad.
Died for multiple how long
924
00:53:19,120 --> 00:53:23,120
minutes or what?
I I mean, I don't know, I just
925
00:53:23,120 --> 00:53:26,320
know she was resuscitated twice.
That is so great.
926
00:53:26,320 --> 00:53:28,960
And she was in a coma for a
little while afterwards, too.
927
00:53:29,520 --> 00:53:33,000
Wow.
Yeah, that's so, so that's the
928
00:53:33,000 --> 00:53:36,600
weird thing is, is you know,
'cause all I really ever heard
929
00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:40,520
was you never knew your mom
'cause she was different after
930
00:53:40,520 --> 00:53:41,480
that.
Damn.
931
00:53:41,760 --> 00:53:44,880
Wow.
So, yeah, it makes for a very
932
00:53:44,880 --> 00:53:48,120
disjointed relationship, you
know, because for sure.
933
00:53:48,120 --> 00:53:50,440
What are you supposed to do?
Like if I've never known who my
934
00:53:50,440 --> 00:53:52,600
real mom is, what's the what's
the point?
935
00:53:52,680 --> 00:53:57,760
Right, actually.
Well, and, and was she even the
936
00:53:57,760 --> 00:54:00,640
kind of person to like have that
understanding?
937
00:54:00,640 --> 00:54:04,640
Like did she talk about who she
was before the accident?
938
00:54:04,640 --> 00:54:07,080
Not really.
Because did you, I feel like
939
00:54:07,080 --> 00:54:10,320
I've heard this before, that
you, you were kind of told by
940
00:54:10,320 --> 00:54:13,560
other people how different she
was before her accident because
941
00:54:14,080 --> 00:54:15,960
didn't she play the piano?
She.
942
00:54:15,960 --> 00:54:17,440
Did she was very good.
You didn't.
943
00:54:17,440 --> 00:54:19,720
Grow up with that.
Obviously, she couldn't.
944
00:54:19,720 --> 00:54:22,520
Play it After that.
I was so crazy.
945
00:54:22,680 --> 00:54:24,720
Lost that ability.
She couldn't sing.
946
00:54:27,240 --> 00:54:31,480
I don't know, like, weirdly,
everybody in my family and her
947
00:54:31,480 --> 00:54:34,000
family, they're all very, very
musically inclined.
948
00:54:34,240 --> 00:54:35,760
Oh, wow.
Very musically inclined.
949
00:54:35,760 --> 00:54:37,120
I mean, they all play
instruments.
950
00:54:37,120 --> 00:54:40,360
My uncle, her brother was a
concert pianist.
951
00:54:40,720 --> 00:54:43,400
Wow.
My Uncle Phil could play
952
00:54:43,400 --> 00:54:44,840
anything.
Like you could literally just
953
00:54:44,840 --> 00:54:46,440
give him an instrument and he'd
figure it out.
954
00:54:46,520 --> 00:54:49,600
No way to be able to play.
So that's where you get your
955
00:54:49,600 --> 00:54:52,280
voice from.
You do have musical jeans.
956
00:54:52,400 --> 00:54:54,520
Wow, I.
I just figured that it skipped
957
00:54:54,520 --> 00:54:56,680
me.
I don't think so, you know.
958
00:54:57,200 --> 00:55:00,520
I just never, I don't know.
And I think too, I was, I had to
959
00:55:00,520 --> 00:55:03,360
do chorus when I was in school,
you know, and that was
960
00:55:03,360 --> 00:55:06,640
humiliating for me.
Oh yeah, you seem to remember.
961
00:55:06,640 --> 00:55:09,360
Just being bad at it and I don't
know.
962
00:55:09,880 --> 00:55:12,200
I mean, that's what turned me
off of instruments, was my
963
00:55:12,200 --> 00:55:14,920
embarrassing band experience.
So see.
964
00:55:14,920 --> 00:55:18,400
And I wanted to not have you
have a horrible experience, so I
965
00:55:18,400 --> 00:55:20,160
figured band would be better
than chorus.
966
00:55:20,880 --> 00:55:23,440
Valid thinking, Mom.
But then I chose the fucking
967
00:55:23,440 --> 00:55:26,000
French horn and decided to be
the only weirdo playing the
968
00:55:26,000 --> 00:55:29,200
French horn so that I didn't
have anybody hiding my fucking
969
00:55:29,480 --> 00:55:30,760
awful.
Which is.
970
00:55:30,760 --> 00:55:38,400
Also ridiculously hard to play.
Let me just choose the hardest
971
00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:39,800
instrument in the whole
orchestra.
972
00:55:39,800 --> 00:55:47,160
Let's just choose that one.
I will say going back to you
973
00:55:47,160 --> 00:55:50,040
too, I saw them when I was 14
years old.
974
00:55:51,000 --> 00:55:53,040
It was the Joshua Tree tour.
Wow.
975
00:55:53,040 --> 00:55:57,000
Mom, that was.
Right before they got huge.
976
00:55:57,320 --> 00:56:01,080
Like Joshua Tree was like their
breakout album really in
977
00:56:01,080 --> 00:56:02,320
America.
I mean, like they had some
978
00:56:02,320 --> 00:56:06,240
songs, you know, like Pride and
and whatnot, that it had some
979
00:56:06,240 --> 00:56:09,160
radio play, but they were just
an Irish punk band.
980
00:56:09,600 --> 00:56:14,640
And then that happened and I saw
him in Cleveland and it was a
981
00:56:14,640 --> 00:56:16,720
massive concert.
I mean, I was 14.
982
00:56:16,720 --> 00:56:19,600
It was my first show.
I was absolutely overwhelmed by
983
00:56:19,600 --> 00:56:23,080
the sheer amount of people.
But what I remember is that Bono
984
00:56:23,080 --> 00:56:25,520
came out in a white T-shirt and
a pair of jeans.
985
00:56:26,040 --> 00:56:30,240
His arm was in a cast.
There was no like, fireworks.
986
00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:36,040
It wasn't glitzy, it wasn't
showy, but it was really good.
987
00:56:36,480 --> 00:56:39,320
It was really, really good.
And I was always really grateful
988
00:56:39,320 --> 00:56:43,360
that I saw them then and didn't
see him after because I didn't
989
00:56:43,360 --> 00:56:46,720
care as much for, you know, how
they evolved.
990
00:56:46,720 --> 00:56:47,640
Joshua.
So how?
991
00:56:47,640 --> 00:56:50,080
Did you go to a concert at 14,
my brother?
992
00:56:50,080 --> 00:56:53,560
Took me.
He was a he was a massive U2 fan
993
00:56:54,440 --> 00:56:57,200
that was like his favorite group
and that's cool.
994
00:56:57,640 --> 00:57:02,120
So, so I was exposed to them
from him and then he bought me
995
00:57:02,120 --> 00:57:06,640
tickets for my birthday and it
was absolutely phenomenal.
996
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:10,280
We had, we had made this really
big sign, his girlfriend at the
997
00:57:10,280 --> 00:57:15,400
time and it was cloth and she
had sewed all the letters on
998
00:57:15,480 --> 00:57:16,280
the.
Cloth.
999
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:19,800
Banner and it was huge and it
said we hear their heartbeat
1000
00:57:20,800 --> 00:57:22,240
because that was one of their
songs wow and it.
1001
00:57:23,200 --> 00:57:24,920
Was.
Really good, that's.
1002
00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:28,760
So cool.
It was that was it was one of
1003
00:57:28,760 --> 00:57:32,200
those shows where like, I don't
remember how many people were
1004
00:57:32,200 --> 00:57:34,400
there.
I mean, it was massive, but
1005
00:57:34,400 --> 00:57:36,920
everybody was singing.
Wow, everybody.
1006
00:57:36,920 --> 00:57:40,000
Was into it like there's a
couple of songs where he like
1007
00:57:40,000 --> 00:57:42,960
really requires the audience to
sing and.
1008
00:57:43,760 --> 00:57:46,320
I think that's where the
intimacy can come from when it's
1009
00:57:46,320 --> 00:57:49,320
this, you know, these huge
things is that you're intimate
1010
00:57:49,320 --> 00:57:50,800
with the people around you.
It was.
1011
00:57:50,880 --> 00:57:53,080
Really intense.
And I've been to a number of
1012
00:57:53,080 --> 00:57:55,440
shows and I've been to a number
of really, really good shows.
1013
00:57:56,120 --> 00:57:59,360
And obviously that was my first.
So it was, you know, true It,
1014
00:57:59,480 --> 00:58:03,280
it, it was whatever.
But I don't think I've ever been
1015
00:58:03,280 --> 00:58:07,920
to an experience quite like that
where that many people are that
1016
00:58:07,920 --> 00:58:12,080
united in song like that.
And it was pretty fucking
1017
00:58:12,080 --> 00:58:13,040
incredible.
Yeah.
1018
00:58:13,760 --> 00:58:17,720
That is really cool.
The dead maybe, but that's just
1019
00:58:17,720 --> 00:58:20,400
weird because everybody's,
everybody's on drugs.
1020
00:58:20,760 --> 00:58:23,280
So it's, it's good.
It's just a little bit
1021
00:58:23,280 --> 00:58:28,200
different, you know, not quite
so charged.
1022
00:58:29,040 --> 00:58:32,440
I don't know how else to say it.
Like, you know, some people,
1023
00:58:32,440 --> 00:58:34,080
it's a dead show are so whacked
out.
1024
00:58:34,080 --> 00:58:36,960
They don't know exactly what's
going on or whatever.
1025
00:58:36,960 --> 00:58:38,000
I don't know.
It's just different.
1026
00:58:38,000 --> 00:58:43,240
It's a it's a drug experience,
not a not always holy, a music
1027
00:58:43,240 --> 00:58:44,240
experience.
What?
1028
00:58:44,400 --> 00:58:46,920
So what year would that have
been for you to see you 2 when
1029
00:58:46,920 --> 00:58:50,880
you're 14 in Cleveland, OH I.
Was born in 74.
1030
00:58:50,880 --> 00:58:55,760
What's 491?
No wait, I'm not doing math.
1031
00:58:55,960 --> 00:59:03,760
Sorry, I'm not mathing 70. 484.
74 + 14 is so 90. 80 No what the
1032
00:59:04,080 --> 00:59:07,000
fuck?
Yeah, 8888.
1033
00:59:07,000 --> 00:59:08,600
OK.
Yeah, that sounds OK.
1034
00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:09,880
That sounds right.
And then?
1035
00:59:10,560 --> 00:59:13,240
When did you start going to
Grateful Dead concerts?
1036
00:59:13,240 --> 00:59:15,800
90 something.
OK, wow, did.
1037
00:59:15,800 --> 00:59:18,320
You go to a few of those, I
went.
1038
00:59:18,320 --> 00:59:21,240
When they came to Denver right
before Jerry Garcia died.
1039
00:59:21,880 --> 00:59:23,160
Wow.
Yeah.
1040
00:59:23,840 --> 00:59:25,680
Wait, is this the concert you
were telling me about?
1041
00:59:25,680 --> 00:59:28,360
Where you almost got concert
crushed and you went to the top
1042
00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:29,600
of the.
No, that was Beastie Boys.
1043
00:59:30,360 --> 00:59:35,280
Tell me about that real quick.
Well, OK, so they were supposed
1044
00:59:35,280 --> 00:59:39,280
to be at Red Rocks, but weather
happened and so they changed the
1045
00:59:39,280 --> 00:59:43,160
venue and it was at the, I want
to say, Colorado Coliseum or
1046
00:59:43,160 --> 00:59:45,800
something like that.
But you know, Red Rocks is all
1047
00:59:45,800 --> 00:59:50,480
general admission.
So we had to go really super
1048
00:59:50,480 --> 00:59:52,760
early and stand in line so we
could get somewhere.
1049
00:59:53,560 --> 00:59:55,880
OK.
It was just, it was a really
1050
00:59:55,880 --> 00:59:58,240
weird venue.
There's a lot of people on the
1051
00:59:58,240 --> 00:59:59,880
floor.
It's like nobody went to the
1052
00:59:59,880 --> 01:00:01,760
stands.
Everybody was just crushed on
1053
01:00:01,760 --> 01:00:04,320
the floor and it was pretty
intense.
1054
01:00:05,920 --> 01:00:08,120
Also, there might have been some
drug use for sure.
1055
01:00:08,120 --> 01:00:14,840
It was a.
On my part, I do kind of
1056
01:00:14,840 --> 01:00:19,120
remember that, but it just like
they were amazing by the way
1057
01:00:19,720 --> 01:00:22,280
they were hell yeah.
So amazed.
1058
01:00:22,280 --> 01:00:26,520
So not what I had expected.
It was so jazzy and funky and
1059
01:00:26,520 --> 01:00:30,240
just mind blowingly good.
Wow, that.
1060
01:00:30,240 --> 01:00:33,320
Is cool, but it was.
Just like you couldn't see well
1061
01:00:33,320 --> 01:00:35,760
because there were so many
fucking people on the floor,
1062
01:00:35,760 --> 01:00:38,480
like squeezing you in.
So yeah, I just climbed on top
1063
01:00:39,000 --> 01:00:43,400
and body surfed to where the
barrier, the barricade is, and
1064
01:00:43,400 --> 01:00:46,240
the security guards grabbed me
and shoved me over to the side.
1065
01:00:46,240 --> 01:00:49,840
And so I ended up with a really
great seat, nice because nobody
1066
01:00:49,840 --> 01:00:53,320
was on the stands.
So it's just kind of like to the
1067
01:00:53,320 --> 01:00:55,360
side of the stage.
Nice, great.
1068
01:00:55,920 --> 01:00:58,280
Yeah, thank God for being small
in that moment.
1069
01:00:58,280 --> 01:01:00,120
I know.
I could just climb on top, could
1070
01:01:00,120 --> 01:01:02,000
have.
Gotten injured as fuck I'm.
1071
01:01:02,000 --> 01:01:04,560
Surprised people didn't, yeah.
Well, they're probably worse.
1072
01:01:04,560 --> 01:01:05,800
They're probably.
Got hurt.
1073
01:01:05,840 --> 01:01:08,280
I just was too inebriated to
know exactly.
1074
01:01:08,760 --> 01:01:09,920
Yeah, 'cause I don't really
remember.
1075
01:01:09,920 --> 01:01:12,840
I don't remember leaving that
show at all.
1076
01:01:12,920 --> 01:01:14,160
Wow.
I have no memory.
1077
01:01:14,280 --> 01:01:18,520
So that was a great night.
I remember staying there and I
1078
01:01:18,520 --> 01:01:20,760
remember somehow I found my
friend Debbie.
1079
01:01:21,240 --> 01:01:23,480
Oh, wow.
Like, out of all of that madness
1080
01:01:23,480 --> 01:01:26,760
and chaos on the floor and she.
But she just did the same thing
1081
01:01:26,760 --> 01:01:29,240
I had done.
And so we just kind of ended up
1082
01:01:29,240 --> 01:01:30,360
in the same spot.
Yeah.
1083
01:01:30,480 --> 01:01:33,320
Hey, it is.
Funny how finally you can
1084
01:01:33,320 --> 01:01:35,400
remember nights you don't
remember.
1085
01:01:35,560 --> 01:01:37,760
Yeah.
Mm hmm.
1086
01:01:38,680 --> 01:01:42,480
Wow, nice, that's cool.
Any other really cool concerts
1087
01:01:42,480 --> 01:01:45,720
that stick out to you?
No, I just.
1088
01:01:45,720 --> 01:01:48,200
Love hearing about some of the
concerts of people that I'll
1089
01:01:48,200 --> 01:01:51,320
never probably see.
I can't think.
1090
01:01:51,600 --> 01:01:56,600
Of anybody right now.
It's just, it's cool your first
1091
01:01:56,600 --> 01:02:02,160
concert experience was when you
were 14 from somebody that your
1092
01:02:02,160 --> 01:02:05,480
older brother turned you on to.
And mine ended up being similar.
1093
01:02:05,480 --> 01:02:09,600
Yeah, because we went to Bass
Nectar at Red Rocks because my
1094
01:02:09,600 --> 01:02:12,040
brother got us all into this EDM
guy.
1095
01:02:13,320 --> 01:02:16,000
I know, and I'm sad now that he
turned out to be a douchebag.
1096
01:02:16,200 --> 01:02:17,920
Yeah.
That's not your fault though.
1097
01:02:17,920 --> 01:02:19,800
That's a whole.
Chunk of like our that's our
1098
01:02:19,800 --> 01:02:21,040
family history.
I know.
1099
01:02:21,040 --> 01:02:25,720
But it's OK, because the nice
thing about it is if you ever
1100
01:02:25,720 --> 01:02:29,760
did turn on one of those songs
nowadays, it would transport you
1101
01:02:29,760 --> 01:02:31,480
immediately.
Yeah.
1102
01:02:31,680 --> 01:02:36,200
Talk about it takes me back.
Like for sure that was a
1103
01:02:36,200 --> 01:02:38,000
memorable.
The first Bassnectar show was a
1104
01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:40,880
really memorable show for me.
It was my first EDM show.
1105
01:02:41,440 --> 01:02:43,560
Oh, I didn't realize that was
your first EDM show.
1106
01:02:43,560 --> 01:02:44,600
I'd.
Never been to anything.
1107
01:02:44,600 --> 01:02:47,400
I'd never been to a rave, I'd
never been to anything like
1108
01:02:47,400 --> 01:02:50,040
that.
And you decided to take your
1109
01:02:50,040 --> 01:02:53,000
two.
Well, it was just Matthias that
1110
01:02:53,000 --> 01:02:55,600
first time.
It was just Matthias, right?
1111
01:02:55,600 --> 01:03:00,920
And and so we get in there and
like I remember we watched the
1112
01:03:00,920 --> 01:03:06,840
first two acts and then somehow
like Matthias just started to
1113
01:03:06,840 --> 01:03:10,960
edge his way away from me and I
didn't really notice at 1st.
1114
01:03:10,960 --> 01:03:14,240
And then all of a sudden he was
just like gone and I fucking
1115
01:03:14,240 --> 01:03:16,280
panicked.
Because.
1116
01:03:16,280 --> 01:03:20,840
Bassnectar like starts and it
starts with I can't remember
1117
01:03:20,840 --> 01:03:22,600
what fucking song it starts
with, but it's almost like
1118
01:03:22,600 --> 01:03:27,240
sirens and it's just, Oh my,
it's pounding because that's the
1119
01:03:27,240 --> 01:03:30,440
music and that's the vibe and,
and I'm just like, I don't know
1120
01:03:30,440 --> 01:03:32,800
where he is and I'm freaking
out.
1121
01:03:32,800 --> 01:03:35,600
And then I ended up smoking a
joint with these people next to
1122
01:03:35,600 --> 01:03:38,120
me and I told them what was
going on.
1123
01:03:38,120 --> 01:03:41,400
And like my son's 16 and I just,
I, this is his first concert and
1124
01:03:41,400 --> 01:03:44,240
I just brought him and they're
like, Oh my God, you're the best
1125
01:03:44,240 --> 01:03:47,240
mom ever.
And I and I look around and like
1126
01:03:47,240 --> 01:03:49,600
I see all these people and
there's somebody walks by with
1127
01:03:49,600 --> 01:03:51,760
like a three foot bong.
How do you get that into red
1128
01:03:51,760 --> 01:03:52,840
rocks?
I don't know.
1129
01:03:53,160 --> 01:03:55,840
And I'm just like, Oh my God,
I'm the worst mom ever.
1130
01:03:56,040 --> 01:03:58,600
Like what the was I thinking?
Oh my God.
1131
01:04:01,520 --> 01:04:05,440
OK, I would have panicked as
well probably.
1132
01:04:05,640 --> 01:04:08,760
No, it was.
But then like finally I, it like
1133
01:04:08,760 --> 01:04:11,200
took me a while and I had to
walk around.
1134
01:04:11,200 --> 01:04:13,000
I had to get out.
I had to walk around and be
1135
01:04:13,000 --> 01:04:15,160
like, OK, look, he's fine.
Yeah.
1136
01:04:15,560 --> 01:04:17,840
He's not.
Like somebody didn't dose him
1137
01:04:17,840 --> 01:04:20,960
with 15 hits of acid and he's
curled up in a ball somewhere.
1138
01:04:20,960 --> 01:04:22,840
Like, that's not what's
happening, you know?
1139
01:04:24,000 --> 01:04:27,440
And then I could let go a little
bit and, like, actually realize
1140
01:04:27,440 --> 01:04:30,800
how good he was as he did put on
a show.
1141
01:04:31,080 --> 01:04:33,560
Hell, yeah.
He really did so good that we
1142
01:04:33,600 --> 01:04:35,320
went back.
Exactly.
1143
01:04:35,320 --> 01:04:38,880
And that and mom, those people
were right.
1144
01:04:38,880 --> 01:04:42,240
You are the coolest mom ever
'cause you gave Mathias his
1145
01:04:42,240 --> 01:04:47,000
first concert experience at Red
Rocks, An artist he was psyched
1146
01:04:47,000 --> 01:04:49,680
about.
He probably got his mind melted
1147
01:04:50,000 --> 01:04:53,080
by how cool that was.
I am bummed that we do have to
1148
01:04:53,080 --> 01:04:56,000
clean up already because like I
said, we could do going fast.
1149
01:04:56,000 --> 01:04:57,920
So yeah.
So hopefully.
1150
01:04:57,920 --> 01:04:59,760
Thank you for coming, Mom.
Yeah, thank.
1151
01:04:59,760 --> 01:05:02,200
You so much for being here it's.
Super fun.
1152
01:05:02,240 --> 01:05:03,280
Yeah, it was.
Awesome you're.
1153
01:05:03,280 --> 01:05:05,560
Inspiring me, you know, I've
always wanted to do a podcast.
1154
01:05:05,680 --> 01:05:08,680
Not always, but passive we.
We've, we've heard that a few
1155
01:05:08,680 --> 01:05:11,760
Times Now that hearing that.
And here's the thing, Mom, all
1156
01:05:11,760 --> 01:05:14,480
of the shit you see here is from
the studio for free.
1157
01:05:14,480 --> 01:05:19,840
I want to do that.
Thanks for tuning in to that
1158
01:05:19,840 --> 01:05:25,640
takes me back broadcasting from
97 OW studio in beautiful Grand
1159
01:05:25,640 --> 01:05:29,760
Junction, Co Today's.
Episode was recorded, produced
1160
01:05:29,760 --> 01:05:33,600
and edited by your hosts Kaylin
David and Maya Sage.
1161
01:05:33,960 --> 01:05:35,600
There's a.
Lot of our conversation that
1162
01:05:35,600 --> 01:05:39,280
doesn't make the final episode.
To listen to full Uncut
1163
01:05:39,280 --> 01:05:42,160
interviews, join our community
on Patreon.
1164
01:05:42,680 --> 01:05:45,480
If you're interested in being a
guest on our show, visit our
1165
01:05:45,480 --> 01:05:49,360
website thattakesmeback.org and
fill out our guest interest
1166
01:05:49,360 --> 01:05:50,600
form.
That's.
1167
01:05:50,600 --> 01:05:56,800
Www.thattakesmeback.org where
you can listen to every episode.
1168
01:05:57,200 --> 01:06:00,360
If you enjoyed listening, please
share it with a friend or the.
1169
01:06:00,560 --> 01:06:03,440
Pile of unfolded book Clean
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1170
01:06:03,440 --> 01:06:04,240
corner of your room.
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